It’s the first week of fall, and I’m already dreading the inevitable flood of pumpkin-flavored everything. I don’t really have a problem with pumpkins themselves (they look pretty cool), but their taste is revolting. And, as we all know, a pumpkin is just a big, stringy squash. Yet somehow, it’s been romanticized into a fall icon. People act as if a pumpkin is the tastiest thing in the world, but in reality, it’s just a gourd. If we treated other gourds the way we do pumpkins, people would see the absurdity. Can you imagine a world with a “zucchini spice latte” or where “butternut squash muffins” crowd the shelves every fall? Exactly: you can’t because the idea of sipping on a gourd-flavored drink is ludicrous.
One of the reasons why I find pumpkin-flavored food and drinks repulsive is because whenever I’m about to bite in, I just imagine the stringy, gooey stuff that lies on the inside of its cheerful-looking exterior and I immediately feel like I’m about to puke. I’m not the only person who feels that way; even the people who say they like pumpkin flavor can’t bear the idea of pumpkin by itself. This becomes obvious when they try to overpower the terrible taste of pumpkin by throwing a bunch of spices into whatever pumpkin concoction they can come up with.
The other reason why I think I am so turned off by pumpkin-flavored food and drinks is because of the over-hype. Pumpkin is marketed as a must-have seasonal experience, but it seems like we don’t have a choice. After all, most companies only roll out a limited number of seasonal specials, and most of them choose pumpkin for the fall, which leads to overexposure.
Even if I did like pumpkin (I don’t), it’s just not the kind of flavor that is meant to be mainstream. This is why I ask that you try to eat less pumpkin-flavored crap, and enjoy normal-tasting food instead. I’m not trying to judge people who like pumpkin, but the only thing in a pumpkin that is remotely palatable is its seeds, and that’s because they don’t taste like pumpkin. For people who insist that the flavor of pumpkin is delicious, I would recommend you go have your taste buds checked out; because after all, who likes the taste of an overly sweet vegetable (not me).
I think we can all agree that pumpkins are a fall staple, and I’m not saying that should never change. In reality, their charm lies in their looks not in their taste, which is why I believe pumpkins belong on your porch, not in your food. This year, make apples your taste of fall, and lay off the pumpkins.
